It was last week. I asked mom to visit my school to attend an education expo for universities. We came to every university, and asked as much question as we can, and we went back home.
At home, my mom finally asked me, which university would i attend? which university stole my heart?
where would i go after i graduate? And I can’t answer it properly.
I don’t know. I don’t know who I’ll be in three years. I don’t know who I’ll be in five, ten, twenty years. I DON’T KNOW!!
I asked my daddy, what would he want me to be? and he said.. “i’ll save my answer for later.. but there’s one thing you need to remember…
your future is not about being glorious, nor being known by people. it’s not about being successful and rich .. but it’s about giving the glory for the LORD’s name.”
he said that. and he also added, “so let yourself found out about it. Struggle with that thought, together with the LORD..”
And it’s been a week, but I still don’t know what my answer is.
I really wanna cry. It’s suffering when you can’t see your own future. My future looks foggy. I don’t know what i should do and what i should reach. Everything looks so .. strange. and frustrating.
Why can’t YOU drop the answer from the heaven, GOD? why can’t YOU? seriously, this is driving me crazy.
but i believe that i will find out the answer. maybe not now, but i’ve asked the LORD of answers. HE will surely answer me, someway, somehow.. TT^TT