I started today’s work by writing a specific rant, which titled “What I feel about working on my undergraduate dissertation.”
After scribbling down to my heart’s content, one thing I realize is that I hate this work.
I’m desperate. I want to graduate on time, and graduate with a good record. To do that, this dissertation is my key. My final assignment. Nobody cares about any of the classes I attended for four years in this college if my final dissertation slumped. And that, I realize, is my problem.
Imagining how to finish such a huge project – planning a research, execute it, and analyze it – is already overwhelming and scary for me, and the fear paralyze my brain.
This black hole in between my ears kept distracting, so that I could not do anything but going away from actually doing something with my assignment. I’ve been stuck with the same gloomy cycle for weeks, and what good does that give me?
And so I start addressing this problem. That I am basically afraid and confused.
A few minutes afterwards, I do the only thinkable help possible : I google my problem. Sounds funny, I know. But then I actually see how many people struggle with the same problem. Many of them found a way to break through.
They all showed me a pattern that I know I have recognized a lot ; they didn’t give up. They try and achieve the small wins, every day.
“Focusing on everything is not focusing, and therefore gets you nowhere.”
It’s taking every small step in between and just making sure that you move everyday, and not giving up. It’s those little successes that brought difference for them.
And therefore I decided, I would do just the same.
I would take the small wins.
I would commit in taking the small steps, one step at a time, and I promise my self I will finish this.
I will remind myself that this is a marathon, not a sprint.
I’m racing with no one, but myself.
And I know, I can win. And you can too.